February is the month of love and romance. It also signifies a moment to express appreciation to family and friends; as love can be shown in different ways.
In connection with the recent celebration of Valentine’s Day, 11Talk features the five love languages. The term “Love Language” refers to a person’s preference for expressing love to—and receiving it from—a partner. The concept and term were introduced by author and counselor Dr. Gary Chapman, who proposed five specific love languages.
1. Gifts
Sharing love through presents of all kinds and sizes is definitely the most common way to show your care and thoughtfulness. However, this has a deeper meaning to those who have gifts as their love language.
People with this love language may seem materialistic to others but to them, a gift is an overt demonstration of your love and appreciation for the person receiving it. Let’s be honest, any presents are quite a good reminder that somebody values us more than we know.
2. Quality Time
If your partner’s primary love language is quality time, you need to set aside time for your partner and be intentional about how you spend that time; because it centers around togetherness.
To achieve the simplest form of quality time, Chapman suggests starting your day with something that allows you to chat and connect, like enjoying a coffee before work. Likewise, find a meaningful way to get together at the end of the day. This will help you both unwind after the workday and talk about your day. “After work, set aside 10 minutes to catch up—no phones allowed,” Chapman recommends.
3. Words of Affirmation
As we all know, communication plays a key role in the compatibility of any couple and a lasting love journey. To those who have the Words of Affirmation as their love language means that verbal expressions of love hold the key to unlocking their hearts.
According to some online research, “many of the problems couples face arise because people feel and express love in different ways. But by learning the grammar of the different love languages, individuals in relationships can improve their communication and increase the odds that they’ll stay together for the long haul.”
4. Acts of Service
While browsing the internet last night, I saw a survey on “how to tell your partner that you’re being sarcastic without being sarcastic.” Two comments stood out for me: “actions speak louder than words” and “you can talk the talk, but can you walk the walk?” At that moment, I realized people who usually ask those have Acts of service as their love language. Because it shows that actions that go above and beyond help them feel someone’s love towards them.
When you give Acts of Service, you give up your time. This non-verbal form of love can be time-consuming and exhausting, but if it’s what your partner needs, then it’s worth the effort.
5. Physical Touch
If your love language is physical touch, you feel love primarily through the closeness that comes with physical touch. It is a silent way of feeling loved. They prefer a hug or kiss to feel loved. People under this category also express and receive feelings of love through gestures of physical affection.
In case you’re wondering why physical touch hits differently, well, it is because it can trigger the release of oxytocin. When partners touch each other, more oxytocin is released into the body. This likely contributes to the physical touch feeling so good.